How to Love Everyone (without losing boundaries)

“But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you”

Matthew 5:44

The value of unconditional love, of universal love, is regarded highly in just about every religious or spiritual tradition I know of.

But how is it possible to have love for someone like Adolf Hitler or others who have committed massive evils in the world? Unconditional love is unconditional. Universal love includes everyone. This means rapists, murderers and warlords.

Condemn the Action, Love the Actor

In the CEBTT course I did, a distinction was made between the action of someone and the person (the actor) doing it. Actors are responsible for their actions, but what we condemn, despise and find disgusting, are the actions – not the actor.

So we can always have love for the actor, and simultaneously have zero tolerance for their (evil) actions. We can recognise their core sanity and even basic goodness, without being idiots about justice and being pushovers.

The bird of enlightenment flies with two wings – compassion and wisdom. Compassion without wisdom is bondage. Wisdom without compassion is bondage.

A mother can love her daughter utterly unconditionally – despite whatever actions her daughter takes. Without contradicting herself she can reprimand and call out her daughter’s stupid actions for what they are – stupid. All this done with love.

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